tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26843947739158488592024-02-19T06:55:46.649-05:00Craig's Personals. WTF are People Thinking?Recently while looking on Craig's List for a new (used) tv, I saw the personals section. Always one to get a kick out of personal ads, I decided to read a few. What I saw really made me shake my head in disbelief.
This is when I decided to create a blog. I am going to peruse the personals for some of the more ridiculous posts. I'll then post them here for all to see.
Enjoy.........Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-9407177558104208202008-04-04T16:57:00.002-04:002008-04-04T17:01:17.241-04:00can't wait, drop my panty! - w4m<span style="font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">I 20y/o and I just put my boyfriend in the sacked coz he's cheating on me. I need a nice guy who can make me forget that beech and can please me all night. Must be D&drug and disease free, respectful to women. If curious then see my pictures xxxxxx.xxxxxx.com</span><br /></span><br /><br /><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage><cubage>Me so horny.<br />Me love you long time.<br />I can't stop saying "I just put my boyfriend in the sacked". <br /><br /></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage></cubage>Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-21709909337600840862008-03-22T15:49:00.001-04:002008-03-22T15:51:06.454-04:00Wanted: Tiny Penis - w4m - 23<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Size matters! I cannot get pleasure with an average-to-large sized male. Is there a nice guy, in good shape, minimally endowed, interested in mutually satisfying hook-up? I'm 23, grad student, 5'1", 105 lbs., Thai-Irish-American.</span><br /><br />OH MY GOD! The only way this posts matches me better is if she added "and be sure you only last 30 seconds in bed"Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-85196982622919186112008-03-15T19:30:00.000-04:002008-03-15T19:31:09.696-04:00boston is for me!! - w4m - 30<span style="font-size:85%;"><strong><em>I'll keep this simple...To be able to know me...well you should ask me..to do that...then find a way to communicate with me...but all I can say is that you won't be sorry once to get to know the real me and I'm a very warm hearted person..now how is that for a quick and simple intro of myself...</em></strong></span><br /><br />Oh, well that clears it up. I think.Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-70238715522924761732008-03-15T19:27:00.000-04:002008-03-15T19:29:07.463-04:00Charming American Beauty - w4m - 29<span style="font-size:85%;"><strong><em>WF, 29. Ravishing and intelligent blonde. Classy and cultured. Seeks sophisticated, wealthy , mature male.</em></strong></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"><strong></strong></span><br />Nothing like posting that you want a WEALTHY man. Because so many wealthy men look on craigslist for women. Jackass.Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-24210226929168190922008-02-18T21:40:00.002-05:002008-02-18T21:43:45.690-05:00bilingual intellectual snob seeks same - w4m - 19<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Im looking for a man who is differnt from the rest. I like all kinds of men and fun. I dont like fat guys so if you are quit lookin at my profile. I'm not a porn star. If you want to get to know me, just approach me in an email.</span><br /><br />I think her post would have been better written like this:<br />Hi, Im an intellectual snob who spells "differnt" wrong. I also leave "g"s off the ends of some words and I never use apostrophes. I'm not a porn star so approach me. Actually, don't approach me. I'm not intelectual at all, I'm just a dumb C*$TFranks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-80712795057010673212008-02-12T17:46:00.000-05:002008-02-12T17:47:35.071-05:00Alone - 32<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > Alone<br />Far away<br />In a forest<br />Where <br />Nobody <br />Will find<br />Me<br />Can You <br />Will You <br />Help me to see<br />Clearly <br />From <br />The hurt<br />Suffering<br />From<br />Pain<br />That sits <br />Inside <br />Of me <br />And <br />Gently<br />Kills me <br />Over and <br />Over <br />Again<br />Long <br />To be free<br />Longing <br />To love <br />Truly <br />Once again<br /></span><br /><br />I think I am going to HURL! Could this post make you seem needier?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-56976987574465701812008-02-12T13:50:00.000-05:002008-02-12T13:51:35.802-05:00Great entry from the OnionThe onion came out with this today. It is related to my postings here somewhat, so I thought I would share.<br /><a href="http://www.theonion.com/content/video/online_dating_helping_pathetic?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">http://www.theonion.com/content/video/online_dating_helping_pathetic?utm_source=onion_rss_daily</a>Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-16780637046030243992008-02-02T18:51:00.000-05:002008-02-02T18:54:39.642-05:00feedings ... - w4m<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > long, big & veiny ...</span><br /><br />Yes, that is all that was entered in the posting. This is my reply:<br /><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Long Big and veiny?</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Sounds like you are looking for an order of tube steak. I have your order, if you have my order of tuna melt.</span><br /><br />Now I just sit by my email and wait right? I mean, she will write me back!? I can't be passed over by a CL hussy? Can I? What has my life come to?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-89290741803304535402008-01-21T20:37:00.000-05:002008-01-21T20:38:47.453-05:00looking for married man with thick dick - w4m - 22<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >looking for married man im married with thick dick love getting finger have my pussy fuck need to cum back condom must not pic im very sexy age is not thing for me write back</span><br /><br />Damit, I was so close. I fit all the criteria, but I was searching for a woman that used punctuation. I could find love if it were not for run on sentences. I guess we all have our crosses to bear.Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-82100070710091060792008-01-19T18:30:00.000-05:002008-01-19T18:31:31.528-05:00nasty fat chick - w4m - 28<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > no joke, i am looking to get raw dogged and cream pied today, reply and send pics if you are down and got what it takes.</span><br /><br />Another in the "truth in advertising" series. Can't really rank on the ones that tell it like it is. :|Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-91607312092421998682008-01-18T17:46:00.000-05:002008-01-18T17:47:39.653-05:00I wanr to go on a piss-drinking diet. - w4m - 26<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >I would like to drink your piss for a new diet. You should be very good-looking, Caucasian, disease-free, and well-mannered. I am polite, discretion-assured, and loved the few times I’ve drunk piss before. I choose to drink with the stream from a cock right down my throat and I don't spill any. I want to drink piss everyday for a while. I'm open to other activities. No reciprocation anticipated. No money involved. I'm 26, 5'9", 130, long blonde hair, eyes dark brown. Your pix appreciated. I can host.</span><br /><br />Seriously, I can't make this shit up. <br />My favorite part was this: "No reciprocation anticipated." Gee thanks, I guess.Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-22218916292723562422008-01-13T11:41:00.000-05:002008-01-13T11:46:00.777-05:00Would you, could you, want to? - w4m - 23<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >I come to town a lot to visit friends and family. I am so ready for some good sex today. I like tall guys so if u r short dont msg me. I'm so ready to do this.</span><br /><br />Would you?<br />Could you?<br />Would you want to in a box?<br />Would you want to with a fox?<br />Would you want to in a house?<br />Would you want to with a mouse?<br />On a boat?<br />With a goat?<br />In the rain?<br />On a train?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-8192178331905370222008-01-13T11:33:00.000-05:002008-01-13T11:34:34.624-05:00fat gal in somerville - w4m<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > swf, good looking, big, tall, curvy, busty, fat, dark hair green eyes<br /><br />i tied a nice buzz on this evening with friends<br />I want to fool around with a friendly relaxed sexy guy<br /><br />lets smoke a bowl</span><br /><br />Sometimes it is refreshing to see some "truth in advertising" :|Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-34796798536721114882008-01-09T17:15:00.001-05:002008-01-09T17:16:35.235-05:00Submissive... - w4m<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Submissive woman looking for a dominant, assertive man for good times. I am in shape, pretty, and curious. Appreciate intelligence and an outgoing, assertive personality.</span> <table summary="craigslist hosted images"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><br /></td> <td align="center"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>Shut up. Stop typing. Fix me dinner bitch. Don't make me be more dominant, as my pimp hand is strong.Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-74571642317207365662008-01-05T07:56:00.000-05:002008-01-05T07:58:46.149-05:00In a cast? - w4m - 23<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > I love fucking someone in a cast...well the idea....never have before but its a fantasy of mine....help me out...<br />xo</span><br /><br />Sorry for the delays folks. Been busy building a new web site for friends. Anyhow, I went looking on CL today for some interesting posts. I found this one. talk about your crazy fetish. Casts? I wonder what would happen if it were my dick in a cast?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-71027660109917093352007-12-23T16:39:00.000-05:002007-12-23T16:44:28.195-05:00sexy feet in platforms - w4m - 25<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Are you sweet, responsible, and descent???<br />If so please contact me so I can fix up my joyless life and possibly be with a intelligent guy for once! </span><br /><br />She wants to be with a intelligent guy for once. Good one!<br />I'm thinking first she should notice it is '<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">aN</span> intelligent', not 'a intelligent' and then maybe she should know the difference between descent and decent. Unless she is looking for a intelligent man that is on the downside of life?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-16798810696988500412007-12-20T18:56:00.000-05:002007-12-20T18:58:51.478-05:00Non Flaky / Non rip off hookup avail??? - w4m - 30<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Hi,<br />My boyfriend and I just dumped our dude -- he no shows and stuff, sporadically.<br />We just need a local solid tree vender...seems simple but... ?</span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> </span><br /><br />Am I missing something here? Non flaky/non rip off is what she is looking for. Her boyfriend and her just dumped their dude for not showing up. And they need a solid tree vender.<br /><br />I wish I could help. Frankly, I would not now where t start!Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-13588634286579761012007-12-08T18:57:00.000-05:002007-12-08T18:59:45.283-05:00can we play in bed - w4m - 21<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Do you like stripper shoes? I have 147 pairs and pictures on me in all of them. If you would like to see a video on me on the pole, email me and I'll tell you where to find it.</span><br /><br />Do I like stripper shoes? Of course I do. I own 150 pairs. Unfortunately for this girl, I only hook up with women who own more pairs than I. at a WHOPPING 147 pair, she falls just short. Maybe her mom has a few pair she can borrow?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-86776344725192506432007-12-01T17:26:00.000-05:002007-12-01T17:29:45.948-05:00Don't be shy - w4m - 36<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><span style="font-size:85%;">I love sex because it's exercise that's fun. It would be awesome if you'd just get on top and drill me. I'm 5 foot 2, 110 pounds, and damn cute if I say so myself. I'm eager to do this.</span></span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;">Excercise that's fun? Running to the fridge for another beer during a commercial is fun exercise as well. Plus, that takes longer than sex.<br /><br /></span>Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-65735923300563953772007-11-24T18:29:00.000-05:002008-12-12T14:47:57.462-05:00Miss Piggy is coming to town and looking for some fun.... - w4m - 33<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Ever wanted to have fun with a big sexy women? This is your chance. If you are into big butts and even fatter tights I will be the women for you ! I am 5'4 and 206 pound heavy and definitly know how to work this bod</span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >y....Interested? E-mail me, I will be in town from Nov 25 - 28....<br /></span><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjPyQy_w02TLmz1W749uMqq7yBUvVAwWOMaDBZhsAp6Jfye89tdvaRmSnS5tZ9W9wQ5d3SWYNy9RfdeySIntdcKeOeuUqDIvhNptncN5iqb3C92kcOEWE9M6Qq2cTSUf964ewY7AWwBMJv/s1600-h/01010701020701160220071124eaa305df449c857b6300d537.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer; " src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjPyQy_w02TLmz1W749uMqq7yBUvVAwWOMaDBZhsAp6Jfye89tdvaRmSnS5tZ9W9wQ5d3SWYNy9RfdeySIntdcKeOeuUqDIvhNptncN5iqb3C92kcOEWE9M6Qq2cTSUf964ewY7AWwBMJv/s200/01010701020701160220071124eaa305df449c857b6300d537.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5136553524544400802" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWhWHaq3glODZjL9I8lWLpG7C_q96LHcVUWVl3ShoiQE9Xt7A3yIvMBW6BEpr098Aor2nSqG_Z3ADQpGV3VZz9vhak2Cs4iTB1dPRzJX5kzDEvpd6XqUEtMaas6rmWPLecyr0isH-7oOAd/s1600-h/0101090102060116012007112432563a43a7d793fe4b007adf.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer; " src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWhWHaq3glODZjL9I8lWLpG7C_q96LHcVUWVl3ShoiQE9Xt7A3yIvMBW6BEpr098Aor2nSqG_Z3ADQpGV3VZz9vhak2Cs4iTB1dPRzJX5kzDEvpd6XqUEtMaas6rmWPLecyr0isH-7oOAd/s200/0101090102060116012007112432563a43a7d793fe4b007adf.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5136553661983354290" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br />WOW. Just wow. I mean, what else can be said?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-30924386020429046082007-11-24T17:34:00.000-05:002007-11-24T17:40:05.393-05:00average companion for LTR sex - w4m - 21<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >Hey I am Christine, thirty eight year old trashy girl in search of funny guy to engage in no hassle NSA sex. I am looking for a sexy friend with benefits and no more. I need a guy that isn't offended when I ask him to lick my asshole. I went out for drinks tonight and I'm looking for a guy with NSA. I'd love to get to know you so send me some pics and tell me some things about you.</span><br /><br />What is with this woman? I think she suffers from low self esteem. First she says in her title she is "average". Then in the first line of her body she calls herself "trashy". Low self esteem or not, she is the first honest girl on CL! If you're not offended by her asking you to lick her asshole then by all means give her a call. Perhaps it could go something like this.<br /><span style="font-style: italic;">"Hello Christine? </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Yes.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">I'm answeting your CL ad. I'm an average trashy guy.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Great, will you lick my asshole?</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Yea, I'm not offended that at all. By the way, can I punch your head repeatedly as we fuck?</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Sure, I have no self esteem at all. I like ot be a punching bag.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">OK, I am on my way."</span>Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-85162340944306927332007-11-09T12:11:00.000-05:002007-11-09T12:24:11.634-05:00Period Play ??? - w4m - 28<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >I have my period but I am still looking to play NO that does not mean I only want to blow you or give you a hand job lol I want my pussy licked and I want to have sex any one interested?? I have pics so drop me a line if you are up for your wings :)</span><br /><br />Did she say "Are you up for your wings"? For some reason I was always under the impression that "blood wings" was a term only guys knew. I guess I stand corrected. I'm sure we are all very curious if this girl gets any responses. I know she will. This IS creepslist personal ads after all. <br /><br />Here is a sample response she could get.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Hey period girl,</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">My name is Mike, but my friends call me Dracula. I am a vampire and i would love to drink your menstrual flow. I am single and live in a coffin in my moms basement. Call me: 1-800-ima-loser. This is a picture of me and my cat.<br /><img style="cursor: pointer; height: 300px; width: 320px;" src="http://www.astro.umd.edu/%7Ekayhan/images/vampon.jpg" /><img style="cursor: pointer; height: 300px; width: 320px;" src="http://www.all4humor.com/images/files/Vampire%20Kitty.jpg" /><br /></span><br /><br /><br /><br />In closing, I would just like to add....WTF is this woman thinking?Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-4355586853395721312007-11-08T19:33:00.000-05:002007-11-08T19:37:42.968-05:00Russian handsome Guys - 29<span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;font-size:85%;" > any handsome russian guys want to take me out on a date? please send me your picture and a few words about you.</span><br /><br /><div style="padding: 10px;"><div style="padding: 10px;">Дата? Вы одеваете в вне первая дата? If not после этого вы изгоняете к Сибирю. Идет Wench!<br /><br />Signed...<br />any handsome (or did she really mean"HAND-some") Russian guys<br /><br /></div></div>Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-22253592112408921312007-11-05T14:14:00.000-05:002007-11-05T14:16:20.235-05:00thrust into my clam ham, your love muscle - w4m<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" > posted here because I'm getting tired of the bar scene. I'm looking for a man who is outgoing, smart and healthy. I need someone who likes to go out and have fun. If you have inquiries feel free to ask me in XXXXXX.website. I am not showing</span><br /><br />Not much to say about this post really, but the title just struck me as funny. It amazes me the endless ways people can come up with to describe their "private parts". Clam ham? First time I heard that one!Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2684394773915848859.post-61802616986467595902007-11-02T09:46:00.000-04:002007-11-02T10:06:25.521-04:00desperate pregnat women - w4m - 19<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >I am a single pregnat chick looking for some hot cock one time and one time only.. if you have a big cock and ready to use it hit me up must have pic.. to get pic</span><br /><br />I wonder how this girl got pregnant to start with? Sorry....I meant pregnat. Sounds better as pregnat. More redneck-ish. Hmmmm, redneck, banjos...Lets write a song!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Sung to the music of the Beverly hillbillies.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Come and listen to the story of a whorey little tramp</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">A cum starved mom </span><span style="font-weight: bold;">who needed someone in her pants<br />Then one day while trolling for hot cock in her "pan"</span><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />Out from her crotch came another dysfunctional member of the clan.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Retard that is. Incest. Brain Damage.</span><br /><br />Well, that's all I have time for now.<br />Thanks to Johnny-on-the spot for pointing this gem out to me!Franks N. Beanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00699138497148627036noreply@blogger.com1